How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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