So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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