Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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