Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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