Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
