if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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