Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize