i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
