the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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