Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them

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(678): View more from Georgia

i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not

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(406): View more from Montana

That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(408): View more from California

This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless

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(225): View more from Louisiana

Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.

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(912): View more from Georgia

If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.

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