Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Randomize
