I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
