Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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