well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize