ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
do you know what's more awkward than a positive pregnancy in a public bathroom?
not a thing
walking in on a stranger's positive pregnancy test in a public bathroom
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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