If i come over, it means nothing
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I just forgot I was standing up.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
