You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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