would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
