So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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