i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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