Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
