btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
