no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
