yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
