I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
