my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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