I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
