great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
He passed out mid-signature
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize