just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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