so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize