oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I am available for nakedness
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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