its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize