I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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