what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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