We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
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