is your mom at the bar?
Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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