its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
