fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
