she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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