i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Just high enough for therapy.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
