a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I just want to make out with him forever
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
