I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
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Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
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I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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