i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
What did we do last night that was yellow?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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