Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
you guys were way drunker than both of me
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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