there was a trapeze. enough said
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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