chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
