Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
