I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
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