1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Randomize
