Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
