You really coming over, don't trick.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.